WOO! eventful night, first drinking with the peoples, and some random funnies and making jokes, potential a mate.
then on to the dessert.
driving home earlier i was getting followed by a cop who decided it would be fun to make a u-turn and drive on my bumper for a week, or at least it felt like it… anyways, while this was going on, i texted dave saying i was getting busted.
then suddenly the cop puts his lights on and as usual, darryl gets owned.
so i pull over and call brandon to LOL at the situation, then quickly hang up so the cop doesnt realize that im actually an asshole and mocking him.
i hand over my license and registration and fumble for the insurance i usually forget, when suddenly the cop just stops, pauses and asks me the most ridiculous question ever:
“why are your pants down?”
well, im an idiot would have been a better answer, but instead i blush crimson red (since it was dark he probably thought i was constipated) and said “oh, it was really hot in my friends room, so i depantsed in order to cool down the uh… yeah”
i could almost feel the nightstick leaving the bat-belt to lay a beat down on me, just for being stupid, but instead he looked at me the way the parents of an autistic child would look at their kid; slighty bemused, with a hint of pity.
i really wanted to fart just to lighten the mood, but instead called brandon to explain. then i put on the radio and the new linkin park song which im a huge fan of came on.
the cop returned and asked me step out of the car. it turned out i’d been swerving, from what i can only assume was when i’d been messaging dave. that son of a bitch always manages to get me into shit even when he’s not around. i’d burn his house down, but im afraid the voodoo doll he has of me would burn as well, possibly leaving me with syphilis or a face similar to quasimodo. yeah, im not far off, but still…
so after a nice talk with the 5-0, and admitting i’d been using the phone, he informed me next time it was a ticket ,and that i was lucky.
i didn’t really feel lucky, so i figured he was full of shit and had rehearsed this speech in the mirror before coming on duty.
its 4:19 am. time to watch turistas and eat oreos, each cookie representing something im too lazy to actually talk about.
g’nite