ok so i have a crush, her name is Anne Hathaway; gorgeous, funny, caring, rocking hot bod, the total package.

Since i feel so strongly about this, i decided to find her on the most useful person finder ever - facebook.

sadly, there’s about 400 girls pretending to be one.

so, i messaged them all, hoping for the best, so far… im still waiting, but im sure she’s just nervous about getting approached by a man with huge balls (refer to my religion) for the first time in a long time, as she’s recently on the market.

though, i stalk… i mean, discuss my feelings about anne with a bit of trepidation, as we’ve never met, and i can only base her personality and such as seen in her films, this is a young but nonetheless budding romance, soon to blossom into something more than i can describe, possibly some sex maybe a seafood dinner.

its the classic story of david and goliath, except in this case goliath is really a super hot babe who is famous, and david, is actually darryl.

really, the only similarities are that im awesome, and david is also a man.

i feel as though billy joel might have said it best as he described this unfurling love in that she is an uptown girl living in her uptown world and im a downtown man… thats what i am.

though, billy joe royal also has a case with his classic hit down in the boondocks. this is pretty much my lifestyle compared to the posh live of miss hathaway.

anyone see the devil wears prada? i didn’t either, but i hear some of the garbs she dons herself in cost more than my car. i’d have to believe this since my ride is worth about the same as a tank of gas. not bad huh?

anne - if you see this, i think we should mate. no, you didn’t just throw up in your mouth a lil, thats the taste of love.

so, my bimbo gal pal friend amy was telling me about the pride parade and discussed with me some pictures of gay mens and their nakedness.

seems old gay men have penis’ that look like fat croissants with anorexic wiener poking out the front.  picture this.

not only will it make you NOT hungry (so you can become anorexic yourself) but you’ll feel better about being you, and not an old gay man with a crazy looking junk pile.

to conclude this note, i’ve added a contest, prize is dinner of your choice, on me.

unlike most contests, this one is open to residents of quebec despite the obvious handicap of being french.

all you have to do is figure out what the common theme here is, and also which my favourite part of this picture is.

simple. andddd go!

Ps. katy perry - i also kissed a girl, and i always like it, unless i don’t.

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